A New Year Has Come...

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It's a little absurd (to me) the attention that a new year gets, that people treat it as a new beginning. There's nothing wrong with that, it's just that every new day - in my opinion - is chance to make a change; a chance to fix things; a chance to do things better. 

Looking back on the last twelve months, though, I've let time slip through my fingers. It's been a year of change, definitely, but that said, I'm not where I thought I'd be this time a year ago, so I'm going to give this 'resolutions' thing a go.

Twelve things for 2012:

1. I want to be a better friend to the people I already have in my life. I want to be a little less selfish; I need to make it less about me, and more about them. Spend time with them. Listen to them. Cherish them. Love them.

2. I have something of a "bucket list"; a list of things I really want to do at some stage of my life. I want to turn it into a 'thirty before 30' list, and start making my way through the list. I want to start doing, rather than always sitting here thinking.

3. I want to update more often. I started this blog as a way of dealing with the multitude of thoughts I have circling my mind, a way to keep memories; something to look back on later and see how I've grown, and so far, I've been terrible at it. I don't want to be someone that posts crap just for the sake of updating, but I have come across a few ideas that could be fun, and will possibly help me to get into a routine with updating.

4. I want to start properly saving money again. Granted, the reasons my savings were wiped out were legitimate reasons, but it's never fun living paycheck to paycheck.

5. I want to give people an honest chance.  I've never felt the need to be popular, and I've never let people in easily. In fact, I try to make it as difficult as possible to befriend me. At the very least, I want to open myself up a little more; learn to trust people, instead of automatically doubting everyone.

6. I want to participate in a few reading challenges. I have been searching the internet for ones that pique my interest, so I just need to make my mind up regarding which challenges to attempt. I've set up a GoodReads profile in anticipation.

7. I have been terrible with my health and fitness over the past year, and as a result, I'm currently sitting at my heaviest weight. I'm not that concerned with a number; I just want to feel good. I really miss boxing, so I want to get back into that, and also attempt the Couch-to-5k beginner's running schedule.

8. Volunteer. This has been something I've wanted to do for quite a while now. I don't know where, yet, but I want to stop thinking about this, and actually do it.

9. I want to be more organised, both at work and home. I've purchased a day planner for 2012, and I've already noted the important events and tasks that I'm currently aware of. This should be easy to keep up-to-date.

10. I want to finish my Diploma in Business. I have two papers left, so all going well, I should be able to finish this, and graduate (finally) by year end.

11. I want to make a scrapbook of 2012. I used to take photo's all the time, but that has fallen by the wayside this year. (Actually, I really need to organise my harddrive in regards to all the pictures I've taken to date. It's a mess.) I think a scrapbook will be a great way to get back into the habit of taking pictures, and also serve as a memory of the year. I'm already in love with this idea.

12. I want to be more positive in 2012. It's so easy to be cynical, to constantly focus on the negative, and that's not fun at all. I want this year to be a great year. I want to be a happier person.

So, there's my twelve things for 2012. Let's see how I go.

A place to spend my quiet nights...

I thought this picture was fairly relevant for a first post because, usually, when we start a diary or a blog it's because we're looking for some sort of direction, or a sense that we're not alone with our misery/problems/life. I don't actually know; I'm assuming here. All I know, personally, is that I have thoughts, and a mind that doesn't stop, so all these thoughts are swirling around in my mind, all the time, and maybe, if I have some platform in which to voice them, I might gain a little clarity, or at the very least, a peaceful night.

I've kept diaries before, and it hasn't really been me. It's like the first day of school where you head in all refreshed from your holiday and raring to go; you open your new book and it's all crisp, blank, white paper, and it feels like a new beginning. You start off with good intentions, too. You mark the date clearly in the top right hand corner, diligently take notes, and it feels great. Eventually though, you make a mistake, because it's life and perfect doesn't exist, but now that white paper, that was so full of options has been tarnished. You become lax, and don't worry too much about taking your time; about making effort. So, this isn't a blog in the diary sense of the word 'cause I'm terrible at that kind of thing; it becomes a chore and really, even at my age, chores suck.

It's more of a place to maybe leave my thoughts, share a few of my likes and loves and just generally, anything that catches my fancy. I don't know...we'll see how this goes. Right now, though? I'm going to get back to listening to my mellow music, drinking my whiskey and 'laxing out on this Friday night (even though I have a massive list of things I should be doing).